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Consider How my Light is Spent

from Sweat of a Martyr. by Daniel Horton

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lyrics

Father I'm clay in your hands
Salt on the sad
Blood on the hands of the guilty
But father I don't understand
You call me your friend
But all I demand is you kill me

Well here come more pitiful words
Blood on my shirt
Knees to the dirt in devotion
I'm hardpressed to call it my curse
Foreknown from birth
But lord, does it hurt to be hopeless

And how could you forgive my flaws
And all of the harm that they've caused
Father I promise I'll try
But I'd still rather die than go on

Cause they say that I've grown but I haven't grown enough
But I've grown as white as these pills I've been throwing up
What good's a reason to live
If I'll just want to die?

Well father I'm guilty again
I know that It's sin
I know that you know that I'm broken
But Father, I sin just to live
So what's to forgive
Choking down this ibuprofen

Well they say that I'm just a kid
Who needs to learn when to give up
But if they saw the scars on my wrists
Then they'd know that's just what I've done

Cause they say that I've grown but I haven't grown enough
But I've grown as white as these pills I've been throwing up
What good's a reason to live
If I'll just want to die?

So is it my heart I've despised
Or just who's inside
I don't know
Cause you say you'll use all these failures of mine
But you're wasting your time
God I know
And I'm sure you've got plans for my life
You've kept me alive for this long
But I'll never know why

Cause they say that I've grown but I haven't grown enough
But I've grown as white as these pills I've been throwing up
What good's a reason to live
If I'll just...

How could you love me like this?
With no reason why

credits

from Sweat of a Martyr., released July 5, 2022

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Daniel Horton Charlotte, North Carolina

Daniel Horton, although young and full of potential, creates music meant to enrapture and impact the heart. Using minimalist and folky instrumentation, his goal is to draw attention to the deep lyrics and heartfelt poesy of his art, in an attempt to create an experience both moving and personal. ... more

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